A Girl Like Me

It is anger, I knew it from the heat on my throat. I may scream and cursed the meanest words that one can pronounce. I may stab and drain the blood out of anyone that crossed my lawn. I may do the dirtiest deeds a man can do.

But I can’t.

Not that I can’t do those terrible things, but the world has shut me down before I even started. Everyone has judged me with their cynical eyes. The old woman whispering to her neighbor “how could possibly a girl do such nasty things like that?” she only whispered but it slaps me right on my face.

The other part of society is meaner. They are nobody to me but they judge the hell out of me about my clothes on their personal religious view. Stating that I am the one who has the most sins, and will rot in hell. They don’t bite but they laugh at me as I was a joke to them, they mock me as I was an object to mock at. And that my friend, is irritating. Like chest pain from being stabbed multiple times with humiliation.

I know it has reached my boiling point. All the words that have been repressed had gotten to the top of my lungs. Ready to burst whenever I open my mouth. The heat is on my throat now. And here comes the older ones. “How dare you talk back to old men like us? We taught you manners, and girl like you wouldn't go far!”

I paused. I can feel my bloodstream travels from head to feet so fast I can even make a waterfall out of it. It was cold so suddenly. I shivered. Not that I felt wrong. But I felt disarmed.  My eyes are wet. Not that I am sad, but I felt insulted.

Holding back my tears, I gulp once more on the ocean of tears trying to catch my breath. All my evil plans and mean things suddenly melted into one. Swallowed by the heat of my throat back to my body. And then it disappears in the midst of my anger. Buried once again in the back of my head. so deep into the bottom of my brain.

I told you not that I can’t, but the world has shut me down before I even started.